The Authenticity Dilemma

The (1)

I have said in the past that I’m passionate about authenticity, however I feel a little wary of that word lately.

For one, authentic has become a kind of a catchword. I’m concerned it might become over-used or even misused and little too, let’s say, trendy.

For another, I hit some hard things in a very personal way and I really don’t like to talk about with anyone. Not even my closest friends. I don’t carry around hidden burdens or bitterness (that I am aware of) but there are certainly topics and experiences that frankly I don’t care to be open about.

I wanted to process this for a minute here on the blog because I think it would be fair to assume that most people reading this have topics or experiences that bring up past hurt. Mine is miscarriage– just the very word brings so much emotion. Maybe for another person it is divorce or drug addiction. Maybe it is the lame questions people keep asking you like, “When are you getting married?” Or, “When are you starting a family?” Maybe it is abuse, maybe it is rejection, maybe it is an issue with a child, the list is long of the things individuals face.

So getting to the point…I wonder, am I still passionate about “being authentic”?

I was drawn to that phrase because I am drawn to people who are open and real…people who are sincere and genuine in the way they talk and live. Does that make sense?

So I guess the tension for me is what about those things we don’t care to be open about? What about the hurting places? The disappointments? The conflict?

Are we still authentic and genuine people even if we don’t want to discuss our hurts?

Has anyone else had these thoughts?

Have you experienced a desire to close off some aspect of your life as far as open discussion goes and did that make you feel inauthentic?

 

I would guess that this is all part of a grief/healing process…and natural, even if total healing is only in the presence of Jesus one day.

 

Maybe it makes me feel a tad better to be authentic about being somewhat inauthentic…lol. You see what I did there? 😉

Additionally, I am so thankful that I can be completely transparent, even with my hurt, with my God. I know he understands me. I know he loves me. I am safe to trust him even when I still feel deeply sad. I realize the value of openness with my friends, family, sisters in Christ etc…We cannot walk around and fake our smiles and yet, there are places in our lives that can only be healed by our God. We can run to him and we can trust him.

Thanks for processing with me…

Singing His Grace,

Jess

 

 

 

On Wings Like Eagles :: How to Face Back-to-school Exhaustion and Tears


My most extroverted and social kiddo was in tears (from exhaustion) last night thinking about returning to school this morning. It is very taxing on our kiddos and teachers to go back to school for a full week. New names, new routines, new rules, new expectations. Yes, Monday was a half day, but it was still five early mornings in a row. Long enough for the new-shoes-new-backpack excitement to wear off!

Regardless of the challenge it presents for our kids and their teachers (I assured my child there were many crying teachers last night too), it does remind us how much we need God’s strength.

I must confess, my first inclination as a parent is to rescue my child…keep them home, write a letter to school administrators, or at least complain on their behalf for a shorter start-week.

But then it occurred to me, what if these very types of stretching experiences are exactly what my child needs? Sure, I would not choose the trial, but it makes my child realize a need for God’s strength and that is more important than rest and comfort.

Because of the exhausted tears of last night, I was able to point my child to the only one who can restore, the One who is our hope. We need him every hour and every minute. Why?

Do you not know?
    Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
    the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
    and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary
    and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall;
 but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint. – Isaiah 40:28-31 NIV

If you find yourself exhausted today and in need of rest, let us remind ourselves that our hope is not in a better schedule, a more organized approach, a frantic striving, or in giving up…our hope is in the Lord.

And here is the beautiful part….when we place our hope in Him, it is the Lord who gets the glory for getting us through!!! We soar on wings like eagles and he is to be praised, not we ourselves. Reminding my child of these truths reminded my own soul of my need for the Lord where I am weary. Perhaps you need a reminder too?

Dear reader, are you feeling exhausted?

Your exhaustion might be school-related, or ministry-related, it may be a family situation, or the weariness of keeping tiny humans alive, or the constant care of aging parents. It may be fighting for your marriage or it might be the exhaustion of grief or even the weariness of a never-ending laundry pile (mountain).

Whatever is sapping your strength and threatening burn-out, discouragement, fear, or depression, turn to the Lord who does not grow tired or weary. He alone can restore you. Let the trial produce hope.

Singing His Grace,

Jess

 

The Message

Don’t you know anything? Haven’t you been listening?
God doesn’t come and go. God lasts.
    He’s Creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn’t get tired out, doesn’t pause to catch his breath.
    And he knows everything, inside and out.
He energizes those who get tired,
    gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out,
    young folk in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.
    They spread their wings and soar like eagles,
They run and don’t get tired,
    they walk and don’t lag behind.

Dear Mom with a child under three…

 

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I see you. I know how hard you work all day long. Forget that, you work all night long too!

A child under three needs constant attention.

A child under three cannot always express themselves with words. They cannot tell you how they feel, or what they want, or what might be hurting them.

A child under three is not very flexible. They need to eat and sleep and play and run and be held on repeat all day long.

A child under three is in constant danger. They are curious and into everything. You cannot take your attention off of them for a second.

A child under three is precious.

Moms, I just want you to know that if you are exhausted, if you feel like you have nothing left, if you feel like you might just go completely crazy keeping up with your little one, hang in there. That sweet little one is working hard too. He is growing. He is learning so much. He is watching you. And even if he doesn’t understand yet all that you do for him, one day he will.

Soon that child will be four then six then sixteen. And all those little minutes of playing and singing and reading and making messes…all of it adds up to a childhood.

So sweet mom, pray through the hard moments, sing through the tantrums, relax about the mess, rest when you can and keep going!

Singing His Grace & Cheering You On!

Jess